Friday, June 18, 2010

Ten Reasons Sharing Your Lap Lane Isn't for the Faint of Heart

Sharing a lap lane can be a real pain.  Here are a few of the reasons sharing a lane isn't for the weak of heart:
  1. the nail trimmer - hug the line too tight and nearly break your finger in the buoys
  2. the navigationally challenged - those who use the whole lane (usually not on purpose) due to poor navigation skills
  3. the leg men - those who use more of the sub-surface than you are expecting (they kick you)
  4. the ax men - those who use paddles and like to chop you when you go by (I never realized swimming was a blood sport until one of these hit me in the arm)
  5. the butterflies - these guys start the butterfly soon as you enter the pool area, just so you won't choose his lane (some even swim with their fists!)
  6. the loose rope - just when you've got a straight line going, the line floats into your path (see #1)
  7. the waterboarders - these are the swimmers who throw up a great swell as they pass, usually when you are inhaling
  8. the jet boats - these are the swimmers who use fins.  They blow by at high speed or if you're at the end of the lane and swimming circles, they force you to stop so they can go past - again and again and again - and they think they are faster than you when you know deep down they are just using them because they are really speed challenged
  9. the loose barges - these are the slow swimmers who generally fit the category of #2 and #3 as well.
  10. the endangered - these are the swimmers who apparently have a respirator ready at the end of the lane because they stop and recover for two minutes for each lap.

Feel free to add your favorites in the comments section!

In my next post, I'll touch on the advantages of sharing your lane.

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